I missed out

I have a friend who just had  baby. She has all these cute pictures posted of her holding her baby right after he was born.

I missed that.

My girls were rushed to the NICU as soon as they were born, both put on ventilators (for only 12 hours), and lived in incubators for the next 18 days. I had a C-section and was on the table for a couple hours after the babies were born. I got to see each girl for a split second when the doctor pulled them out and then I didn't get to see them... UNTIL THE NEXT DAY. It was horrible. My sweet husband went to the NICU about once an hour and took pictures of them and got updates for me, but as you know, it wasn't the same.

When I did finally get to see the babies I had to practically beg to get them out of the incubators. I definitely wanted what was best for the girls, but this Mama needed to hold her girls. I got to hold Jemma and my hubby held Jaycie. Let me tell ya, there isn't much to prepare you for a 4lb baby. They were so tiny. I just wept.

My girls are fine. I am blessed that they only had to stay 18 days considering they were 6  weeks early. I was told to prepare for 6 weeks, but my little rock stars showed everyone they are superstars.

I still miss it though. I hate I don't have those first pictures.

I have a different story this time around.